A three-step program for footballing success

by awindram

[tweetmeme source=”awindram” only_single=false] After disappointing World Cup exits for the US and England, their respective football associations have begun dissecting what went wrong and how they can ensure future squads will be better equipped for World Cup glory.

Naturally, a lot of talk will be about improving the technicality of players, the funding of a national youth academy, the quality of coaching, etc. However, having just read this charmingly titled article (“Could a brain parasite found in cats help soccer teams win at the World Cup?”) by Patrick House in Slate about toxoplasmosis the likes of Trevor Brooking and Sunil Gulati could be forgiven for forgetting all about investing in youth and should simply adopt the following three-step program. Do it right and you’re guaranteed to win in Brazil in four years time.

Step 1: Procure toxiplasam gondii-infected rats.

Step 2: Release toxiplasam gondii-infected rats.

Step 3: Sexy footballing glory in 2014.