Christmas songs a British expat is unlikely (perhaps thankfully) to hear in the US

by awindram

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Little Donkey

As Claudius poured poison into the ear of Hamlet’s father, British primary schools do likewise to the ears of many a parent who are forced to sit in a freezing school hall listening to their offspring sing this dirge come Christmas concert time. 

Jona Lewie: Stop the cavalry

Cliff Richard: Saviour’s Day

A few summers ago in Kentucky I was having a pleasant chat with a man about the 60s invasion of British bands. He was of that generation and was happy reminiscing about his teenage years listening to the Stones and the Kinks. Thinking back to all his old EPs he mentioned that he had been fond, back in the mid 60s, of Cliff Richard. “Whatever happened to him?” he asked me. “You really don’t want to know,” I replied.  

Cliff Richard Mistletoe and Wine

Come Christmas, there really is no escape from the Cliff – he’s ruined more British Christmases than Oliver Cromwell. 

East 17 Stay Another Day

Bless ’em, some cockney midgets try to look intimidating while singing a Christmas ballad and dancing like morons. It’s almost sort of endearing.

Shakin’ Stevens Merry Christmas Everyone

How to explain Shakin’ Stevens to an American? Imagine a Welsh Elvis but without the talent, sexual charisma and compelling life story.

Wizzard I Wish It Could be Christmas Everyday

Of course you do Roy. It’s the only time of year you receive any royalties.

Slade Merry Xmas Everyone

The ubiquitous Christmas song. Except not so ubiquitous here in the States. To think, I haven’t heard this in a single store on a single TV advert this.