48 long, dark nights for America: Dictator Chic

by awindram

Forty-eight long, dark nights to go.

Trump’s Daily Twitter Highlight: “The situations in Tulsa and Charlotte are tragic. We must come together to make America safe again. Hopefully the violence & unrest in Charlotte will come to an immediate end. To those injured, get well soon. We need unity & leadership.”

Clinton’s Daily Twitter Highlight: “. is more than just a great running mate—he’s a great guy to have as a friend, too.”

Daily election article of interest: Is Hillary Clinton Turning Into Jeb Bush?

With forty-eight restless sleeps left, my thoughts are turning to that most pressing of all matters: What will the White House china service of the winner look like?

For clarity’s sake, by china service I don’t mean how accommodating will the new President be to Beijing considering how much US debt the Chinese own. No, I am writing, deadly seriously – as is my wont – about what the new porcelain set that the President will order for the White House will look like.

I am, if I am entirely honest, not optimistic with either scenario.

We know that both candidates are plutomaniacs, and an obsession with power and wealth to that extent rarely leads to a refined, understated taste. And we have seen already one Clinton china service during Bill’s presidency. It is almost certainly the gaudiest of all the Presidential sets. Gold rimmed plates that adhere to all the tenets of dictator chic – hideous glitz and an overweening desire to impress, overawe and intimidate that fails because the end result looks, despite all the lavish spending (the Clinton china service cost half-a-million dollars), mockingly cheap.

But as tacky as the Clinton’s aesthetic choices are, I am confident that a President Trump china service would … well … trump theirs. This is a man for whom the dictator chic aesthetic comes easily. Trumps buildings – their interiors overadorned with gold and marble – are erected in testament to him; a sort of Reaganomics take on the the Presidential palace of a banana republic. While his charitable foundation has spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on six foot portraits of His Trumpiness. This is a man who gets dictator chic, who on a purely despot fashion level could out-Gaddafi Gaddafi.

The Trump china service would be a think of  beauty. Not merely gold rimmed like a Clinton service, the whole plate should be gold so as to better appreciate the sharper image Trump steaks that visiting dignitaries would enjoy. But we can’t leave the plate entirely plain, perhaps a delicately scripted letter T in silver should be placed on its center, while around its edge could be inscribed the noble, old family motto – “you’re fired.”