Culturally Discombobulated

Tag: America

America Comprehended: Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest

NATHAN’S HOT DOG EATING CONTEST: Held every Independence Day on Coney Island and broadcast on ESPN, Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest is the Wimbledon of gross overconsumption. Great sporting events should move the heart, the only thing moving at this event are the competitors’s bowels.

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America Comprehended: The Liberty Bell (military march)

THE LIBERTY BELL (MILITARY MARCH): Patriotic American military march now more recognizable as the theme tune to Monty Python’s Flying Circus; British payback for the American appropriation of that paean of British patriotism Pomp and Circumstances being used for American kindergarten graduations.

America Comprehended: Taco Salad

TACO SALAD: Two words that are utterly incompatible with one another (cf. Jello Salad).

America Comprehended: The Hokey Pokey

THE HOKEY POKEY: The hokey pokey is what Americans call the hokey cokey. Savages.

America Comprehended: Pitbull

PITBULL: Slapheaded rapping genius behind such songs as “Oh No He Didn’t,” “Mmm, Yeah,” and “That’s Nasty.” One pitbull we shouldn’t be too upset about being put-down.