The diminishing returns of Cadbury’s creme eggs
by awindram
An obedient Catholic child, it was during Lent that I first felt what it was like to be the victim of a perceived injustice. Roused by adults I trusted to forgo some luxury for forty days, I became – like so many other children – a short-lived penitent by giving up chocolate.
To my distress this period of self-denial would coincide with the cruel release by Cadbury’s of their creme eggs. As Christ during his forty days and forty nights in the desert had to endure the taunts of Satan, so I had to endure the knowledge that thousands of other children were at that moment gleefully licking off their fingers the remaining traces of chocolate and fondant. How I wanted to be like those children, sticky with confectionary, gloriously hedonistic in their desires but instead I had asceticism thrust upon me.
Now it is possible that this childhood experience has left me with deep emotional issues and an unhealthy fondant fetish that requires thousands of dollars worth of therapy; what is certain is that as an adult I do get giddy with excitement when the first creme eggs of the year coyly appear on the supermarket shelves. Now I no longer have to stoically resist them, but can instead indulge myself like a robber baron feasting on oysters.
That creme eggs are freely available in the States was an unexpected bonus when I moved here. However, my initial excitement was soon soured when I bought my first all-American creme egg and experienced the second great injustice of my life – the country that created the super-size meal was foisting on its fine, corn-fed citizens a creme egg distinctly smaller* than the ones those effete limeys over the ocean enjoy.
*Now I wouldn’t dispute that the UK creme egg has also diminished in size – it used to fit snugly into an egg cup, a fact I know as I was dorky enough that I used to do this – but as the picture in this link shows the US egg is smaller again.
Culturally Discombobulated 
You’ll just have to eat twice as many!
Can’t really fault that logic Jill. Off to gorge it is.
It also used to be an inferior product if not made in England. Since Kraft have taken over Cadbury’s (sob) however, they have assured someone that I know, that it’s all either made in England, or true to the recipe. It is, in any event, rather easier to come by.
I must admit though (sacrilege) sp?, that too much of a cream egg in your gob is a bit cloying. Everything in moderation.
The chocolate shell seems a little thinner on account of the smaller size, feels a little different when you bite into it.
I must confess that as a chocoholic, I wonder how much real chocolate is in these eggs. I did not grow up with them and have no emotional or traumatic attachment to them, but certainly have tried them over the years while raising children. Beautiful as they look, they mostly taste of sugar to me and the filling makes my teeth ache. I need 72-75% chocolate to get a high. However, I am happy for you you can get your fill of your childhood cravings, even if these eggs are smaller now.
Yeah, I like them primarily for the nostalgia hit.
Sneaky b*****ds! And there was I thinking that the reason they seemed smaller was because I’m now an adult. Should have learned my lesson when they shrank Wagon Wheels…
A Creme Egg is always going to be a disappointment in Canada anyway, because unless you’ve remortgaged you house and opened an account at the local British store, the chocolate is just not the same http://wp.me/p1J9Lk-Ey