The circular reasoning of the USPS, or the real reason so few Americans own a passport
by awindram
2011 figures revealed only 30% of Americans owned a passport, they did not reveal the percentage of people who attempted to submit a passport application and were frustrated by USPS efficiency – something I experienced this week.
Me: “I’d like to submit a passport application for a child. I’ve got all the paperwork here and filled out.”
Postal Worker: “Do you have an appointment? You need an appointment for us to accept that.”
M: “Okay, can I schedule one?”
P: “No, I can’t do that for you.”
M: “Really?”
P: “Yes, only a supervisor can schedule a passport appointment.”
M: “Can you get a supervisor then?”
P: “No, they’re all unavailable.”
M: “All? There’s not a single one of them available?”
P: “Sir, they’re all in a meeting.”
M: “Well, how long will it be until one is available?”
P: Ponders. “It’ll be an indeterminate length of time.”
M: “Indeterminate? So their meetings aren’t for a scheduled amount of time? They just go in there and nobody knows when exactly they’re coming out?”
P: “You’re welcome to wait, sir.”
M: “For how long?”
P: “As I said, indeterminate.”
M: Sighs. “There’s no way you or anyone else can make the appointment for me?
P: “No, it has to be a supervisor?”
M: “Is there any other way of making an appointment?”
P: “I can give you the number of a supervisor and you can call later and make an appointment.”
M: “Great, what’s the number?”
P: “I’ll be honest, sir, I can give you the number but the supervisors never really answer their phones.”
M: “Seriously, you just can’t schedule an appointment for me?”
P: “No, but a supervisor would be happy to.”
Culturally Discombobulated 
That sounds marginally worse than here! What an effing nightmare. Did the postperson keep their cool throughout the encounter – that gruesome rictus smile?
yeah it is a bit of a nightmare trying to get an apt for a passport for a child in US. Also the mum and dad have to be present for the application although I suppose they are doing it to stop child trafficking but it is a bit of a pain to take the day off work to get a passport for your kid.
We are a third world country now.
Make sure both parents go to the USPS when you DO get that appointment. Only one parent = no passport (unless you have evidence that the other one is dead, or some kind of complicated paperwork proving that it’s OK for only one parent to be there.) We didn’t need an appointment at our post office, but there are only certain times of day when that special someone is there to accept the application.
I loved the first paragraph (the stats NOT quoted) let alone the rest of this. And I’ll bet none of this is made up. I forget how Americans love those words like ‘indeterminate’, when the Brits would just say ‘Hard to say.’ Or similar. Good luck with that appointment!
But at least they don’t do what Post Office counter staff do here, and try and sell you half a dozen different products.
“Now you’ve bought a stamp for that card, can I interest you in any mortgage advice?”
That type of thing. It’s ridiculous. Only yesterday, the woman behind the counter said to me “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but a previous customer was talking to me about life assurance, and I just wonder if YOU have any life assurance needs”. I felt like replying “that previous customer who was talking to you about life assurance, did she raise the subject out of the blue? Or was she, perhaps, saying something like “No, thanks. I don’t need any life assurance” in response to a question from you?”
Gosh, I feel a blog post coming on.
HA, that is awesome. And by awesome, I mean awesomely horrible but funny.